Bergadian

Sunday, November 27, 2005

The Large Green thing that was sitting in my bedroom

It wasn't there when I finally surfaced, so imagine my surprise when I went to bed.

What on earth was it? It was about 36" long, and 40" in diameter. Covered in plastic, and propped up on my manual wheelchair. Sort of overlapping at the sides, as it was definitely fatter than I am. Sort of squidgy when squashed, and too heavy for me to lift.

And where did it come from, and how did it get there?

Ah - patience, patience (so I told myself) and all will be revealed.

Just wait.

Waiting over when my part-time carer turned up the next day. Oh, she said, that's your duvet. It was in the cupboard under your bed. (Was it? Who put it there?)

Tantrum from me. I don't WANT the duvet on the bed yet. I don't NEED the duvet on the bed yet. I will NOT have the duvet on the bed yet.

Very funny. As if I a choice in the matter. Well, I got my own way for a couple of days, when she carefully unwrapped it and put it out to air, and then it was on my bed, whether I liked it or not. Little does she know that it spends most of the night kicked off, with SD curled up on it!

Well, I'm not going to tell her, and SD won't tell her.

So please, people, don't tell her either!

Monday, November 21, 2005

The Attack of the Gremlins

I'm not sure who they are. What they are. Or why they are here. But they are definitely around, doing their best to cause as much nuisance as possible. I can't see them. I can't hear them. And I don't know what they have done at the time.

So why is it that a few days later I discover something uninvited, unwanted, and totally unexpected?

Such as the time when I opened a cupboard to get something I KNOW I put there, I was promptly hit by dozens of empty plastic mayonnaise jars and empty plastic bottles, which I am convinced I never saved?

Where did they come from? No idea.

What were they doing there? No idea.

How did they get there? No idea.

Well, surely I couldn't have used THAT much mayonnaise or whatever came in those little bottles - could I? And If I had, why on earth were they all saved?

OK, assuming I did use that much whatever, I still have no idea why they were all saved. So then the problem was, what on earth was I going to do with them all? More to the point, how was I supposed to get around the place to pick them all up.

Sat. Thought. Oh yes, go get the nearest picker-upper and a large plastic bin bag and put them all in it.

F u n n y. Have YOU ever tried to pick up plastic jars and bottles with a picker-upper?

Two hours later..................

Everything picked up and in the bag. Now, Gremlins, I've finally beaten you. Or have I. Still got a large bag full of plastic jars and bottles, wondering what to do with them.

One hour later....................

Brilliant idea - phoned up a friend who works at the kindergarten down the road and asked if her little charges would like them. Bingo - almost as soon as I put the phone down, she was here, ready to collect the lot!

GOTCHA GREMLINS!!!!! Yah boo sucks.

But..........

I never DID find the things I was looking for in the first place.